Ways To Fill The Time

Horrible atrocious virulent dream
Not sure if it happens before or after 4AM thunderclap.
This gigantic bite out of the sky
that seems summoned from my worst subconscious.
In the dream, I am armed & killing those around me,
pointing 9mm (somehow, the specific caliber is confirmed)
at backs of heads.
And firing point-blank at brains & necks.
The bedroom window is open &
the bleak pre-dawn storm is sidled up beside me.
No insulation or drawn screens.
The monster is in the room with me.
I'm sharply awakened & actually sobbing,
then flitting in & out of it.
I know I want to get up & let Kitty in,
I'm sure the poor thing's drenched under some bush
or floppy leaf.
But I can't get up 'til later.

Around 6AM the weather's cleared & there's sunshine.
I get up & open back kitchen door
& Kitty skitters across lawn.
I swear that cat must have an invisible line
drawn 'tween its paw & that door.
There is rarely an interval
'tween the opening/shutting & Kitty's appearance.
I feed Kitty,
shuffle off back to bed.
The cat, of course, follows & lays at bed's end...
expanding like a microbe on a glass plate.
Soon the cat has half the bed.

When I wake up next it's mid-morning.
The dream from hours before seems like a figment
of my hyper-creation.
I have my two bowls of Raisin Bran,
my left over cranberry-orange bagel from Bagel Time
& my glasses of OJ.
I read 1980's Detective Comics,
some of the 68pp $1.00 ones w/ the entire Bat Family.
I am conforting myself w/ this routine,
this throwback in my childhood room
w/ Robin, Batgirl, The Demon, Elongated Man
all along as camp counselors.
The stories are simplistic & exciting.
I like how even Batgirl gets upset when she wrecks
her Batcycle in one particular investigation.
"That'll take me weeks to repair," she bemoans.
See...even a superhero gets grounded now & then.

Dad leaves for 11:30AM mass.
I head out on the road...
although I had a record-breaking day Friday of (62) billboards
it wasn't enough.
I still have so much ground to cover--
Brockton, Easton, Millis, Holliston.
June's rain has crippled me in the dayjob...
all the billboard postings I was supposed to photograph...
well, I'm so very behind.
And it's getting too late
as July's copy goes up.
I lose photo opportunities every day,
and none of the A.E.'s particulary care...
they just want to bill their client
& make their money.
I'm only holding that up.

I mid-stream my afternoon in Foxborough
@ Patriot Place.
Sarah & Matt are playing a free outdoor show @ 2PM,
followed by another WBCN Rumbler-- The Motion Sick.
Sarah & Matt play a few new songs.
There are maybe 30 people in attendance.
It's a weird venue for many reasons--
1) it's in South Shore, MA & not at club
2) it's outdoor & upstaged by shopping mall
(& further, the open plaza space is off-side
to main thorough-fare...I even had trouble
finding it).
3) it's mid-day & their fanbase is not exactly Cambridgesque
I photograph the set, videotape their closer-- "Riots..."
There is awkward interaction as I say hello after the set,
I might as well be creepy stalker guy.
I need to remember these folk are clients, not friends.
Never friends. OK to be friendly...but don't presume too much.
That anyone would be happy to see you.

I also photograph The Motion Sick,
they're pretty durn good.
Lead singer has a crazy moustache.
Like Groucho Marx in a tight-fitting shirt.
Their drummer is a fighter & a flailer--
it must be 80 degrees out & he's incindiary,
never letting up.

I return to work van,
removing my contacts & sunglasses...
I drive for as long as I have gas.
But I don't get the boards in Marlborough,
I don't make it to Route 9.
See? Never enough time or daylight or gasoline.
I may even have to put in a few bucks tomorrow AM,
just to make it into work.
I do find a great little used bookstore off Rte 126?
& pick-up a couple horror anthologies
(one has Beaumont & H.R. Wakefield).
I could live in that store.
I'm at peace in the far corner of that store,
alone except for the proprietor.

Now it's after 7PM & I am back home.
What money I had left I spent for supper--
0.88 pasta
1.00 canned sauce
0.75 French style stringbeans
I spent more on the books!
Ah well.
And that was how I filled the gaps.